Celestial Diary

Stigma

Stigma is a mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person. It is a negative label placed on a person and based on this label, these people are judged whenever they do or say anything. Stigma also involves negative attitudes and beliefs that lead to social rejection or exclusion The church has a way of stigmatizing people based on their past, their actions and their appearance. It is not to be confused with prejudice and stereotypes which are usually harmless. Prejudice is the biased opinions individuals hold while stereotypes are generalizations made about a group. Together, they contribute to social challenges and inequalities.

What are common stigmas that can be found in the church?

1. Crime/delinquency: This is a stigma attached to individuals with a history of breaking the law, both adults and juveniles alike. The stigma intensifies if they have served time behind bars, as society tends to view them as dangerous and likely to corrupt those who associate with them. While it’s true that they may have made mistakes and committed crimes, does this justify the church turning its back on them?
   it’s disheartening to witness the premature labeling of individuals as criminals or delinquents without taking the time to know them. Superficial judgments based on appearances, such as tattoos, streetwear, or unconventional hairstyles, can lead to assumptions about gang affiliations or corruption. We should asks ourselves if this is how Christ treated people?
   Certainly, people are encouraged to maintain decency in the house of God, but it requires true wisdom and understanding to implement this in their lives. While individuals naturally transform as they grow in Christ, our failure to witness immediate change doesn’t grant us the authority to cast them out of the presence of God.
2. Tainted: This term often refers to something that has lost its shine, luster, or quality, and is frequently used metaphorically to describe a person’s reputation or image that has been damaged or diminished. However, who are we to declare someone has lost their worth? Where in the Bible are we given that authority?
   The individual in question may indeed be guilty of a sin that temporarily puts a stain on them, but have we forgotten the concept of forgiveness? As stated in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” If they’ve confessed their sins to God and He has forgiven them, why are we still calling them unclean?
   Their past might involve various sins, such as adultery, fornication, strife, manipulation, heresy, or even a grave crime. However, the moment they genuinely come to Christ, willing to change their ways, we cannot label them as tainted anymore. Continually doing so makes us the sinners, no different from the Pharisees.
3. Failure: In all honesty, life is filled with challenges, and stigmatizing someone based on these setbacks is quite ridiculous. Experiencing a divorce, having a child out of wedlock, losing a home, dropping out of school, or losing a job are events that can happen to anyone. These circumstances are not indicative of spiritual shortcomings or a lack of faith in God. Each of us faces unique trials, and the journey to overcome them varies for each individual. Passing judgment, excluding, or condemning people because their lives don’t align with conventional notions of success is unjust.
   Consider how Jesus, God incarnate, faced ridicule from those mere humans whose life He could end in an instant. Yet, He had to endure the suffering because He had a divine purpose to fulfill. As Christians, we should be mindful of our thoughts and words, recognizing that those of us who perceive ourselves as holy may be deceiving ourselves. Instead of rushing to judgment, let us embody the compassion and understanding demonstrated by Christ.
4. Race and Ethnicity: In certain church environments, individuals from racial and ethnic minorities may encounter both subtle and overt forms of stigma, impacting their sense of belonging and hindering full participation in the church community. Cultural differences play a significant role in shaping our experience of Christ; for instance, some churches may refrain from speaking in tongues on the altar but engage in fervent prayers with audible expressions. Others may opt for hymns over instrumental praise and worship.
   Choosing a church where one feels comfortable is entirely reasonable, and variations in church culture are as diverse as work cultures in different companies. The challenge arises when churches or their members are criticized for having distinct operational styles or when individuals are condemned for preferring a church aligned with their preferences.
   The crucial factor is whether the church or its members follow sound doctrine and serve God according to His principles. Besides that, race or ethnicity should not pose a problem.
5. Sexual orientation: This stereotype is common within the Christian community. According to the Bible, the only sexual relationship recognized is between a husband and a wife, meaning a biological man and a biological woman who are married to each other. Any relationship outside of this framework is considered a sin. Can someone be both a Christian and gay? Yes, they can, just as one can be a Christian and struggle with alcoholism or dishonesty. Being a Christian is an identity, and it is crucial to distinguish our sins from our identity.
   The church should not practice exclusion, discrimination, or hatred towards individuals with different sexual orientations. However, this doesn’t imply an endorsement of such behaviors. I believe the challenge arises when individuals proclaim to be “Gay and proud.” Pride in our sins is not compatible with our Christian identity, as it separates us from our Father in heaven. As a church, we should exercise wisdom and patience when addressing these matters with our members.

Churches, like any community, can foster judgmental attitudes and make individuals feel scrutinized for their choices, lifestyles, or personal circumstances. This can create an unwelcoming environment for those who do not conform to certain expectations. Legalistic churches may also stigmatize individuals who do not follow their man-made rules or traditions. This can create a culture of judgment and condemnation for those perceived as falling short of the established standards leading to them leaving the body of Christ.

Mental health challenges

Mental health challenges are often silent struggles. We can’t fully comprehend what goes on in someone’s mind or how it affects their well-being, yet we tend to make assumptions based on their outward behavior. Here are examples of mental health struggles and the associated stigma:

1. Addiction: Individuals struggling with addiction may face stigma within the church, where their condition is sometimes perceived as a result of moral weakness rather than a complex health issue requiring support and understanding. Many times, these individuals genuinely desire to overcome their addiction but struggle to find the right support. Addiction comes in various forms, such as eating disorders, excessive exercise, pornography, substance abuse, sex, technology, etc. It often remains hidden, requiring a closer look to uncover. Those dealing with addiction need understanding instead of critique, even when it appears they may not want to cooperate. It’s important to recognize that addiction often begins as a coping mechanism to escape difficult situations or emotions. Show love rather than disgust, and be open to supporting those around you who may be struggling.
2. Depression: This isn’t the temporary sadness you experience when you miss your bus or go through a breakup. Depression is a deep sense of sadness, hopelessness, and disinterest in life that persists over an extended period. Unfortunately, many may perceive individuals dealing with depression as dramatic, sensitive, or spiritually distant, without fully understanding the impact it can have on their lives. It’s not surprising that those struggling with depression may find it challenging to engage in spiritual activities or connect with fellowship.
3. Anxiety: They experience excessive worry, fear, or panic attacks, and their reactions might be perceived as attention-seeking or exaggeration. Concerning religious beliefs, rituals, or social interactions within the church community, they constantly worry that they might be lacking or fear going to hell for not following a specific rule.
   Church members may generally perceive them as believers who lack faith because they wonder, ‘Why are they worrying when God has assured us that all will be well?’ It’s crucial to understand that, although they know God is on their side, they can’t help but worry. It’s like scratching an itching wound, fully aware that it will take longer to heal when doing so.
4. Burn-out: When someone is burnt out, I assure you it’s not out of laziness. Exhaustion—be it emotional, physical, or mental—is a genuine experience. Even among church leaders, burnout is often overlooked. Overcommitment to church activities can lead to physical and emotional exhaustion, impacting overall well-being.
   Ever wondered why the children’s teacher seems constantly tired and agitated? Have you considered the number of kids she has to take care of every Sunday? Do you know what’s going on in her life? When was the last time you bought her a gift to show appreciation for her efforts?
   Some pastors frequently complain that their members and leaders aren’t doing enough, but when was the last time those pastors genuinely appreciated the little they did do? Do you believe that praying over someone is enough to say thank you?
   If you can’t relieve someone of their emotional and physical burden, the last thing you should do is add to it
5. Psychosocial challenges: People are uniquely built, and what I can tolerate may differ from what you can endure. Some are biologically more sensitive than others so how we communicate matters—do we make others feel worse about themselves, adding to their guilt and shame? Or do we judge and isolate them as a form of punishment?
   As a church, let’s open our Bibles and observe how God handled the weak and sinful. We can express love and correction without resorting to harsh words. In fact, I believe that a mature adult should know how to communicate disappointment and anger without resorting to insults or degradation.

It’s crucial to acknowledge that mental health struggles can impact anyone, regardless of their background or religion. These emotional challenges significantly affect an individual’s well-being and behavior. Let’s avoid being the cause of someone’s depression or suicidal thoughts, and instead, strive to communicate with empathy, just as Jesus did. The journey to eternal life is already challenging enough, so let’s support each other in every way we can.

How to overcome

While it’s easy to list out problems in the church and point fingers, true strength lies in actively working on those issues. How do we change our perspective on certain topics? How do we avoid stigmatizing people? And most importantly, how do we support those who struggle with mental health challenges?

1. Education and Understanding:
   • Encourage the church community to educate themselves about mental health.
   • Provide educational resources about mental health within the church community.
   • Organize workshops or seminars to raise awareness on mental health issues and reduce stigma.
   • Train church leaders on recognizing signs of mental health issues and how to offer support.
   • Equip leaders to address mental health topics in sermons, teachings and during private counseling.
   • Proverbs 4:7 – “The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.”
2. Promote Compassion and Empathy:
   • Emphasize the importance of compassion and empathy towards those facing mental health challenges.
   • Ensure that everyone, regardless of their mental health status, feels included, safe and valued.
   • Emphasize that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. And encourage a safe space for people to seek help.
   • Colossians 3:12 – “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”
3. Create a Supportive Environment:
   • Foster a safe environment where individuals feel safe to share their struggles without fear of judgment.
   • Encourage open dialogues during church meetings or small group sessions.
   • Establish support groups for those dealing with mental health challenges and implement systems for regular check-ins without prying into their personal matters.
   • Foster a sense of community and understanding within these groups.
   • Train volunteers or leaders to recognize when someone might need additional support so they know how to act accordingly.
   • Galatians 6:2 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
4. Incorporate Prayer and Spiritual Guidance:
   • Integrate prayer into the healing process and seek spiritual guidance.
   • Emphasize the importance of faith, patience and trust in God’s guidance.
   • Philippians 4:6-7 – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
5. Encourage Professional Help:
   • Acknowledge the value of professional mental health support and encourage seeking help when needed.
   • Establish partnerships with mental health professionals or organizations. This makes it easier for referral when a problem becomes too much for the church to handle.
   • Provide (financial) resources for professional counseling when needed.
   • Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 – “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”
6. Combat Stigma Through Open Conversations:
   • Challenge stigma by openly discussing mental health issues and promoting understanding.
   • Offer pastoral counseling services for individuals facing mental health struggles.
   • Ensure confidentiality and a non-judgmental environment during counseling.
   • James 5:16 – “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
7. Promote God’s Unconditional Love:
   • Emphasize God’s unconditional love and acceptance, irrespective of mental health struggles.
   • Romans 8:38-39 – “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

The church should be a sanctuary for the broken, similar to a hospital. Turning away those in need would be like a doctor refusing a patient with an ailment, denying them the opportunity for healing. Instead, let’s welcome them with open arms, patiently supporting their journey as they explore different treatments. If one approach doesn’t yield results, let’s avoid hasty judgment and seek second opinions from other Christians, churches or pastors. Collaboration with other faith communities can provide varied perspectives. Even if all attempts prove unsuccessful, let’s not abandon them; rather, refer them to places that may offer help and keep them in our prayers.
Remember, God’s love extends to the entire world, not just Christians. The unity of the body of Christ emphasizes that the glory of a redeemed soul belongs to God, not the pastor or the church that played a part.
In essence, let’s cultivate love, patience, and open acceptance for one another within the church community.

Stay Blessed x